BITS 1997 Batch Silver Jubilee Reunion (21st – 24th December 2023)

I am still not ready to let go of 2023 especially because it had been a perfect yin-yang kind of year for me. What better way to ring the year end festive season than to spend an extended weekend with friends from 25 years ago and relive the magic of the place named BITS, Pilani.

21^st – 24^th December marked the silver jubilee reunion for the 1997 Batch of BITS Pilani and I am still revelling in the magic of those four days. The most amazing end-of-the-year experience one could have, and hold it beyond the turn of the year as well – time with friends to reminiscence in the nostalgia of yester years, by visiting the campus that shaped us during our late teens, make new memories in the same place by giving back, take in the changes that the campus has gone through, and still see the remnants from the years that we spent on campus and more.

Penning this note was an exercise to organise the flood of emotions and memories I have been experiencing, and in the process have a memoire to look back upon fondly for years to come. There is another personal reason for wanting to hold on to those wonderful moments. This was my first outing (on my own) in the last s6 months. I was (and still am) recovering from a surgery (two if you consider the minor surgery for addressing an infected incision site) that was a result of a freak road accident in May 2023. Only around mid-November did I start walking without support. My surgeon and physiotherapist approved me for this travel only on 19^th December 2023 (based on the progress of my recovery), after clearly explaining the dos and don’ts, and a knee-brace to be worn all the time I was on my foot and amidst crowd. Of course, I was scared, yet I wanted to be part of this once-in-a-lifetime event, which is why I hadn’t cancelled my travel bookings, that I made before my accident. I packed light and only for the mandatory dress code activities. The rest was to be winged (repeat, pile-on, or…) as any student did while on campus.

21^st December 2023

Come 21^st December, my heart rate increased in anticipation as well as anxiety and I know I was not alone in the anxiety part, yet my mom, spouse and children who have been caring for me the last 6 months happily sent me on my merry way with encouraging words and words of caution to not overdo (knowing that I tend to do exactly that). I thought I would be the only BITSian on that flight to Delhi from Chennai. I was pleasantly surprised to have another BITSian, Foodking Sarathbabu as my travel companion and he willingly helped me with luggage until we checked into Hotel Taj, Gurugram. Some of my batchmates were already there and some trickled in behind me at the check-in counter. My fogged memory had difficulty with names though many faces were familiar. Thankfully quite a few were having similar issues and we decided to blame it on our age, mommy brain and what not and started re-introducing ourselves. There was a hi-tea icebreaker session a couple of hours before dinner. The dinner was set up in the 1990s Bollywood theme with red carpet and arches at the entry of the banquet hall, photo booth with props, and drinks of choice. The usual gratitude to the OC (Organising Committee) & Rec n Acc (Recreation and Accommodation) team that made this event memorable sharing the journey leading up to the event followed by a pop-trivia quiz about BITS and our favourite hangout spots set the competitive edge rolling and the energy levels high to start off the music night by music clubbers after we finished our dinner.

The peppy numbers by music clubbers saw many people on the dance floor. Except for the difference in venue (from BITS), the energy levels were the same, and I felt that all of us were back to the teens that we were in 1997. Even if my foot was alright, I had two left feet when it came to dancing, so I was happily watching the others dance, while I sang along. When Marline dedicated a song for the first loves and started signing Zara Zara Behekta Hai from Rehana Hai Tere Dil Mein, I was missing my BITSian life partner, as the Tamizh version of this song was our all-time favourite (Vaseegara from the movie Minnale). She transitioned to the Tamizh version halfway through the song and the sing along became more personal. After a couple of songs, I headed to my room, ensuring that I followed the instructions of my surgeon & physiotherapist, preserving my strength and energy for the remaining three days.

22^nd December 2023

On reaching the Pilani campus after a 4-hour long drive from Gurugram in a fun-filled bus ride with my friends, the first thing I did was to get ready for the Saraswati Mandir visit in traditional wear for a batch photo. After a while in the mandir, I went back to Vfast hostel (the on-campus stay for visitors) for the bonfire night and dinner. The rooms did not have heater which brought back memories of the shivering nights & early mornings of our initial winter in Pilani, especially for those of us who came from warm and humid tropical climate like Chennai (then Madras). It took a couple of semesters to get used to this weather and learn about layering to stay warm. Thankfully the water heaters at VFast were functional, which spared us from recreating the no-bath experience of our student days in winter.

23^rd December 2023

The morning began with a walk/run on campus. I did not join this for obvious reason 😊 After breakfast, it was the department visits and stroll around the institute on the agenda, before the Leadership faculty interaction. I decided to start my day by visiting BITS Library. For someone who was (and is) always seen with a book in hand no other place could have been a starting point. As I entered the library, I was thrilled to find my debut book featured on the display table marked as MUST READ. I had to get a picture clicked here with the Deputy Librarian Mr. Ghosh. I also handed over a few more paperback copies of my book Imperfect Parenting: Honest Stories from Global Parents (for the library of the other BITS Pilani campuses). A BITSian author friend of mine Ramya Srinivasan (FD97A3PSXXX) had entrusted me with the responsibility of passing on copies of her book, The Write Way, to be added to the special display shelf exclusively showcasing works by BITSian authors in BITS Library, and for the library of other campuses of BITS (Hyderabad, Goa). From here I walked to the Rotunda just opposite to the iconic clock tower of BITS for our batch photos.

This Rotunda connected to the New Academic Block (NAB), an underground new block with lecture rooms and auditorium which ensures that the view of the institute and Saraswati Mandir remains unobstructed, and the greenery is also retained as ceiling of the buildings.

We had a Leadership Faculty Interaction at the J C Choudary NAB Auditorium. I found myself pleasantly overwhelmed when the current Director of BITS Pilani, Pilani campus, Dr. Sudhirkumar V Barai, recognised me by my name and initiated a conversation. The conversation itself is a haze because of the flood of emotions that was experiencing. His appreciation on my published book and this interaction will be a memory that will be etched in my memory for life, in addition to the one-on-one conversation with Dr. Arya Kumar, Dean Alumni Relations. Never in my wildest dream did I, an introvert, ever imagine that I would be in the presence of such esteemed visionaries, thought leaders, and vibrant personalities.

Next on the agenda was lunch organised by the Director for our batch at the RB (Ram Budh) mess. The scheduled itinerary of events had a break of 2.5 hours after this, letting each of us do what we wished. I decided to visit my hostel (MB – Meera Bhawan) rooms and managed to see a couple from the outside as they were locked by its current inhabitants who had gone home for their semester break. Having the campus all to ourselves was a huge plus, letting us become the teenagers without having worry about acting our age.

I am still amazed at how I managed to be on my foot all through the morning and afternoon until 3 p.m., the time retired to my room and to wait for my family (spouse and 2 kids) who were enroute from Chennai. They arrived at 4:30 p.m. They were welcomed by my batchmates as well and we made a visit to Saraswati Mandir. From there we went to Sky Lab, said hello to Pappu and had his special chai, which was a regular part of our lives when we (me and my spouse) were students. From there we joined the rest of the gang for the hi-tea in IC (Institute Cafeteria). After hi-tea we walked down to FD II to the spot where I had proposed (to my current spouse - Kaaba), before heading to C’Not place (no less than a similar named place in Delhi).

I finished my dinner with my batchmates while my family went to Blue Moon restaurant, to enjoy the signature dish of Fried Paneer Maggi. After dinner, I joined my family and shared a plate of fried Maggi with Kaaba, while my kids enjoyed plain Maggi – which they felt was more delicious (maybe the cold weather) than the one we eat in Chennai. My family dropped me at the main Audi (Auditorium) for the Music Nite organised by the music clubbers of our batch. I was tired and ready to retire for the day but wanted to enjoy this experience. So I stayed for a couple of song while my family checked in to their room in an accommodation just outside the campus, off-loaded their luggage and came back to pick me up from the Audi and dropped me back in my room, before they went to theirs.

24 December 2023

It was time to bid goodbye to the campus (for now). I was happy that I was able to make it to this reunion with my limited mobility and managed to cover as many events as possible and quite a few places to visit, relive old memories and make new ones, until my next visit. On this last day we also got to experience the morning fog (Kohara), which is a usual occurrence in the month of December and January. It is such a beautiful one to enjoy watching, if you are not driving through it. I was on the last bus out of Pilani. The day before was a full day on my feet, and I still am wondering how I managed to be on my feet for almost 2/3^rd of my waking time, but it did take a toll on my weak muscles. The pain was pronounced, and my recovering leg felt stiff.

From the time I checked into Taj, there was always someone close by to ask if I was okay and always ready to help with anything that I wanted - drink, plate refills, water or to ensure that I could safely get back to my room. Even on the bus ride to and from Pilani, I had people getting me chai because I could not (and did not want to) get on and off the bus multiple times. This willingness to be there for each other, pitch-in without being asked for, go the extra mile to ensure that everyone had fun, and a place where formalities take a back seat is how the magic happens here and stays with us through our life. This is one place where masks come off, and we all laugh, talk, and enjoy with no barriers (gender, language, religion, economic/social status) blocking our interaction and fun. We are peers and we all are bound by the camaraderie of bringing that magical spirit for everyone to experience. During my recovery, I joined the Yearbook team as a volunteer to ensure that I was a small part of the reunion, even if I was unable to make it in person to the campus if my mobility did not improve, but I am so grateful that I was able to make it and the yearbook became an additional colour to the beautiful memories that I am taking with me from these 4 days of unadulterated fun and magic with friends in a place that was pivotal in shaping me to who I am today.

In 1997 when I got me admission letter to BITS, my dream college, and yet I started faltering because I had already joined B.Sc Mathematics in Ethiraj College, Chennai, my mom and maternal uncle sat me down and convinced me to go with this advice “You are going to BITS to experience life. Studies can happen anywhere. So go to BITS for its experience and exposure.” I am so glad I heeded to their advice. Even when I started for this trip, this uncle of mine messaged me “Go and bask in friendly adulation” and how so right he was. The friendly adulation was so authentic and warm that even after a week, I am still basking in it, and I doubt if it will wane at all soon! Maybe this was the driving energy that provided me with the strength to be able to visit as many places on campus as I did as well.

Many of us had lost touch with each other after graduating. This reunion and the technology of today has helped us to stay connected with each other from here on. Hoping for more gatherings in the future (small or big) to keep the spirit of BITS Pilani and its magic alive all through our lifetime. Ever grateful for the opportunity that I had to be a BITSian forever!

Wishing you all a very Happy New Year 2024!

My First FB Live on 'Coping with Social Change', Learnings & Recommendations

My relocation to India has not just been a personal learning curve but also been good for my professional exposure and experience. Yesterday, 17 May, 2020, I attempted to host a live session on Facebook (FB) for SuperParents, an initiative of Divyam Trust.

I prepared on a topic "Coping with Social Change", which was close to my heart and relevant to the new age parents. 

I learnt how to conduct FB live session, toggling between my laptop and mobile, to screen share my presentation online. The session was planned for 45 minutes including Q & A, and I managed to time check quite well. Thankfully I had prepared the visual cues and rehearsed the entire narration by self-recording. Being a weekend my spouse also obliged to sit in and observe my rehearsal, providing valuable improvement feedback to make my presentation style and flow of content more engaging with the target audience. Both of these helped me get through my first session with confidence and deliver my best for this maiden attempt. 

The entire live session is available on the SuperParents FB handle as three separate videos (Introduction, the main presentation and the Q & A). 

Having a budding digital artist in-house does have its own advantages. I enlisted my daughter's help to stitch the three videos into one full-length video, using KineMaster (adding watermark and snipping relevant portions and exporting options etc.).

So here is the stitched video that runs for about 45 minutes from start to end! 

With this experience, my recommendation to Solopreneurs/Mompreneurs/Homepreneurs & those who are part of the gig economy are:

1. Understand and leverage the Internet to your personal advantage starting with:
• Having profiles set up on at least the basic platforms - FB, Instagram, LinkedIn and Google. Depending on your target audience and the reach you would like to have, you can explore other options too including Twitter, TikTok, Youtube, etc.
• Familiarise yourself with the messengers of the above social media accounts and actively respond to messages that you receive. You never know when one of these might become your prospective client or a word-of-mouth marketer for the services you offer.
2. Using Mobile and Laptop to join and host online sessions
• Have the necessary plug-ins and tools downloaded and installed. Try them with your family and friends
• Any updates of the existing software that need to be done also have to be taken care of.
3. Know and familiarise with basic tools that are needed in today's world (Zoom, WebEx, FBLive, Hangouts/Meet, Microsoft Teams (Advanced users), Zoho social/meets.
4. Give adequate care to personal appearance as well, especially if you are conducting live video sessions. This is important because your appearance can impact the impression people have on you and if you are hosting a session on behalf of an organisation, then they also base their opinion about the host organisation as well on the basis of your appearance.
5. Invest in a good quality headset (with mute / noise cancelleation options, to cut-off unwanted noise in your background) and camera (with HD option). Helps in making professional streaming videos with good picture and voice quality.
6. Preparation is the key. Trying to make impromptu speeches live, may not be everybody's cup of tea.
7. Rehearse, Rehearse, and Rehearse - The importance of this cannot be emphasised enough. It helps you deal with time-checks, fog-on, browser & software issues and other non-verbal cues/fillers that might end up diverting focus from the point-in-discussion. E.g. In my case, because I rehearsed, I realised that the regular version of Google Chrome did not allow me to start a FB Live video from my laptop. I needed to download the beta version. I still need to understand why it was so, but doing it ahead of time helped me in being prepared with the necessary software for conducting the live on the scheduled date at the right time.

Saying Goodbye to 2019

As parents, there have been times when we the years just whizzed past so fast - some we recollect with fondness while some bring with it a heaviness in the heart. 2019 has been a year with both.

Refitment to Indian Way of Life: When we moved back to India in 2018, settling in a young family (2 children aged 12 & 8) to the Indian way of life without losing the learnings over the years that we picked up from our other travels abroad (UK and France) was a challenge looming in front of us. We have always been adaptive in that way, but the good thing is that as a family, we also retained all that we loved from every culture that we happened to experience during our travel and still retaining the "Indianess" in us. The initial 6 months were very difficult but as 2019 began, the family settled in with each of us finding our comfort zone with our extended families and new-found friends, and neighbours.

Getting Back to Professional World: After resigning from my Technical Writing career (13 yrs back), I managed to stay connected with writing through my blog, volunteering and freelancing projects, wherever we relocated! This move back to India gave me connections with Alumni and friends through whom I have been able to find a part-time position in a start-up and explore the avenues of branding myself as a Consultant Content Developer, Career Counselor & Trainer/Tutor. This is a personal achievement that I am very proud of. Our parenting has been instrumental in bringing forth the instant adaptiveness from my children to this change of mine, my spouse's unwavering confidence in me, and my mother's close presence are a few things I am grateful to have to my advantage!

Quality Time with Family: 2019 saw many from our extended family visiting us at our home. Children got to spend quality time with their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. The interactions that ensued - some were captured on a camera while some remain etched in our memories (a camera of its own kind). They also got to spend a few moments with their great grandmother before she went on her life's last journey.

Personal Fitness: Morning walks that started as an effort to control my obesity and a chance to have meaningful conversations with my spouse. Zumba came as an addition for better cardio training on the insistence of a friend, which surprisingly I have started enjoying. Weight training is a recent addition to muscle strength and toning. A hashtag that started as a fun conversation with my spouse has now become my mantra for fitness - #FitBy50.

Overall the year that went by had some great moments, some personal growth, some personal losses - a typical sine wave - with its crests and troughs. This year, I think, was a perfect example of what life is all about - yin-yang combination - the good in bad, and the bad in good going hand in hand - the transientness of happy and sad, success & failure, gain and loss - a content year in all. Guess I have finally grown up enough to understand this - of course reaching close to the milestone of 40 years of age I am sure, has nothing to do with it (wink).

Wishing you and your Family a Happy 2020. Keeping in mind the WhatsApp message that is making the rounds, do not forget to make it a habit to write the year as a four-digit representation instead of the usual 2 digits (I have been doing this for 2 decades now).